Davevaginitis.

Recently, being jobless and whatnot, I've reverted to my night owlish nature. I am perfectly fine with this. A problem arises, however, when one is hungry and wants food, and it is three in the morning. Choices, as you can imagine, are limited. Within, say, a ten block radius, there are relatively few places to get food - an East Indian Convienience Store, an all-night Subway, Denny's, and Tim Horton's.

I was hungry, and didn't like the options in my fridge or cupboard. So, I decided to run down to Timmy's. I haven't been there in a few days, though I'm usually a regular (it's a two minute walk away). I'm usually in there every day on my walk home from work, to pick up a small iced capp.

Kittens has told me, multiple time, that the term "iced capp" is a misnomer. Because it is physically impossible to ice cappuccinos. See, a cappucino is mostly foam, and you can't really freeze foam.

But, I quit drinking Iced Capps (and diet coke, in fact) a few days ago, both in an effort to save money and to take better care of myself. Because that shit is poison. There's this river in Atlanta that takes the run-off from the coca-cola factory, and they found that the fish in this river are 335% more likely to develop birth defects, and many birds have been found dead in the water from an increased intake of unhealthy carbolic acids.

Sounds true, right? I made it all up, but I'm sure it's fact. Some way or another.

But any port in a storm, and Timmy's does have some decent menu items beyond their chemically delicious iced capps. As I head down the street, hands thrust in my pockets, I decide to pick up a bagel, and maybe a little bit of cream cheese. Not a super healthy choice, but not a terribly unhealthy choice, either.

I head in, nod at the face behind the counter, and take my place in the line. Yeah, Timmy's is awesome. They have a line at three in the morning. Mostly drunks, the homeless, security guards, paramedics, and students. And asians, for some weird reason. As if, they were never able to acclimatize to the new time zone, and they're all still stuck on china time.

I'm thinking all this when I step up to the counter. And a small iced capp has already been made, and placed before me.

"1.98" I'm informed, and an empty hand is thrust at me, waiting for my toonie.

Yes. The night staff at Timmy's have seen me often enough to know that I always order Iced Capps, and were confident enough in this fact to make it for me without asking. It was ready before I got to the till, pretty much.

I was a bit stunned. Should I return the iced capp? After all, I didn't order it. But then, isn't this really my fault? I mean, I'm a regular, and I order this all the time, so is it really their fault for assuming? Most times, I'd be flattered if they remember me enough to know my order. Do I want to discourage their assumptions and attentions?

All this runs through my head before I give them the two dollars. And then, after I give them the money, I casually say, "hey, can I add a bagel to that? They look good."

As if the bagel is an impulse purchase in addendum to my iced capp. I don't know why I do this, but I'm sure there's a psychological term for it. I imagine it's some sort of "conflict avoidance" thing. Or maybe it's just "Davevaginitis". I hear it's treatable.

I took two sips of the iced capp in the store, and threw it out on my walk home.